Of course! Although our experiences are completely different, I feel like there's a lot of similarity in the feeling of "color returning" - it's such a hard thing to explain, but since joining substack, I've seen at least a couple others mention feeling this way too, so clearly it's more common than I thought. 💖
So much appreciation for you sharing this, Deborah. 💛 The way you describe coming back to feeling again, even when it’s scary, is so powerful and healing. Thank you for putting this into words.
literally sobbing. it’s insane how we are going through the same things at the same time. i’m at the end of my 6 months too and the inevitable is upon us and i feel less scared, more sure of myself. the poems are my proof that my colors are coming back. (still crying). i’m so very proud of you, and so thankful you have a group of women that can hold space for your pain and your laughter, but most of all i’m thankful you have remembered love for yourself. i also feel 14 again. 😭
Oh Krissyleigh, I hate that you know what this feels like. But I joke that you feel just a little bit less alone. I love that you said the poems are proof that your colors are coming back... that is it exactly 🥹 thank you for being here and for your kind words, we are not alone!!! 🤍 Sending you so much love 🤍
“Hope is not safe” names something many people feel but rarely say so plainly. When disappointment has trained the heart to survive by staying braced, numbness can start to feel like protection, even while it quietly becomes its own kind of prison. What moved me most is that you do not rush past the sorrow, anger, rage, or fear in order to call it healing; you show healing as the slow return of feeling itself, one walk, one cry, one laugh, one small act of staying at a time. Thank you, Deborah, for writing with such courage about the frightening and beautiful work of coming alive again.
This is absolutely stunning writing. I have tears in my eyes as I write this because, as someone who has mentored many women writers, I see genius here. Your word choice, your rhythm and pacing, your imagery is so vibrant - I am with you. I hear you. I really do hear you.
Keep writing and sharing your gift with the world.
Oh Corrie Ann 😭😭 thank you, thank you, for these kind, beautiful words. I feel enveloped in so much love and support. It means so much. Thank you for being here 💖
got goosebumps during this read. Wow wow wow so beautifully written. So much SUBSTANCE. So unbelievably encouraging to read this, knowing you are able to experience hope and joy despite your circumstances. That your hope and joy don’t depend on your circumstances. Sounds like freedom 😭😭
"The numbness is wearing off.
Color is returning to my world."
I know the feeling...it's so surreal (strangely, I wrote a similar post not too long ago!).
Oh Tonya, this made me so happy. I would really, really love to read your article if you want to send a link to it!! 🤍🤍
Of course! Although our experiences are completely different, I feel like there's a lot of similarity in the feeling of "color returning" - it's such a hard thing to explain, but since joining substack, I've seen at least a couple others mention feeling this way too, so clearly it's more common than I thought. 💖
https://tonyamickelson.substack.com/p/cozy-coffee-break-golden-light-the?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android&r=2iyb92
Loved this piece; you can feel the door opening up a crack and more of yourself coming out. I could feel the expansion!
Thank you so much Grace!!! It's been such a long, grueling process. But one step at at time 🤍
There is nothing more freeing than tearing down those walls that you put up to protect yourself, but that only caused more pain in the process.
Oh Alex, you get it!! This is it exactly. It is both incredibly freeing and terrifying at the same time. Thank you so much for being here 🤍
Goosebumps reading this. So brave to start feeling again, to step out of the numbness. I hope your pink shines brighter and brighter 🩷
Oh Jolene, thank you for this comment and for your kind words. They mean so much. The colors are getting brighter every day 🥹🤍
So much appreciation for you sharing this, Deborah. 💛 The way you describe coming back to feeling again, even when it’s scary, is so powerful and healing. Thank you for putting this into words.
Steena, thank you so much for your kind words!!! Thank you for being here 🤍🤍🤍
❤️✨
Resonating piece—thank you for saying this out loud.
Thank you so much Deb. And thank you for taking the time to read and for being here, it really means so much 🤍
Such beautiful heartfelt writing!
Thank you so much Donna!! This means so much, truly 🥹🤍
You write so beautifully !!!!
Thank you so, so much for these kind words. They mean so much 🤍🤍
literally sobbing. it’s insane how we are going through the same things at the same time. i’m at the end of my 6 months too and the inevitable is upon us and i feel less scared, more sure of myself. the poems are my proof that my colors are coming back. (still crying). i’m so very proud of you, and so thankful you have a group of women that can hold space for your pain and your laughter, but most of all i’m thankful you have remembered love for yourself. i also feel 14 again. 😭
Oh Krissyleigh, I hate that you know what this feels like. But I joke that you feel just a little bit less alone. I love that you said the poems are proof that your colors are coming back... that is it exactly 🥹 thank you for being here and for your kind words, we are not alone!!! 🤍 Sending you so much love 🤍
🫂🫂🫂
“Hope is not safe” names something many people feel but rarely say so plainly. When disappointment has trained the heart to survive by staying braced, numbness can start to feel like protection, even while it quietly becomes its own kind of prison. What moved me most is that you do not rush past the sorrow, anger, rage, or fear in order to call it healing; you show healing as the slow return of feeling itself, one walk, one cry, one laugh, one small act of staying at a time. Thank you, Deborah, for writing with such courage about the frightening and beautiful work of coming alive again.
Thank you so much Rev. Kevin, for this thoughtful comment, and for taking the time to read. It really means so much!
This is absolutely stunning writing. I have tears in my eyes as I write this because, as someone who has mentored many women writers, I see genius here. Your word choice, your rhythm and pacing, your imagery is so vibrant - I am with you. I hear you. I really do hear you.
Keep writing and sharing your gift with the world.
Oh Corrie Ann 😭😭 thank you, thank you, for these kind, beautiful words. I feel enveloped in so much love and support. It means so much. Thank you for being here 💖
😭😭😭💗💗💗
Love you so much 🩷
wow, this was so beautiful and so touching; "Maybe, my heart isn't permanently broken" ♥️
Thank you so, so much for the kind words 🩷 It is so, so appreciated 🤍
Debbie, this is SO beautiful. I love you!
Thank you 🥹🥹 Love you so much!! 🩷🩷
Okay WOW. The amount of times I
got goosebumps during this read. Wow wow wow so beautifully written. So much SUBSTANCE. So unbelievably encouraging to read this, knowing you are able to experience hope and joy despite your circumstances. That your hope and joy don’t depend on your circumstances. Sounds like freedom 😭😭
Very powerful essay.